Amanda Sanders

Self Confidence

Amanda Sanders

Time has crept up on all of us. As happy as we are about the sun coming out and spring closely approaching, in the back of our minds we are thinking about one thing: beach season. Some people with rocking bodies and killer abs are probably jumping for joy and already thinking about the first time they get to step foot in the sand. As for everyone else, maybe we are okay with waiting just a little longer to get into our bathing suits?

As a personal shopper and wardrobe stylist, I have seen many occasions of my clients not being comfortable with how their bodies look and it breaks my heart. I’ve watched my clients and good friends deny gorgeous, designer clothing because it was “wrong for their body” or “doesn’t fit/look right.” Bodies are all different shapes and sizes and of course we should never objectify to one perfect size or look however, we must always feel comfortable in our bodies. After my clients notice that one thing after another “isn’t right for them” they get discouraged and I watch them shut down all together. Clients are especially terrified in early April to try on bathing suits because they are not ready and do not want to see what they’ll look like. I obviously honor their choice, but it hurts me to watch my clients be so hard on themselves and it is my job to make them love how they look.

When you start to doubt yourself there are only two options to fix it; one is to make a change and be devoted to the change for a better you or the other is to just accept yourself ad you are. Both of these options can be very difficult, changing your body requires lifestyle changes and accepting your body requires looking past your insecurities.

If you need some help changing your body, here is my advice:

-First and foremost, join a gym. You need the option to be able to work out.

-For motivational purposes, as soon as you get home from work, change into workout attire and sneakers. You are more likely to work out if you’re ready to go, all you have to do is pick up a water bottle and get to the gym.

-When you are at the gym, listen to music that is motivating, upbeat, and of course makes you happy. It will really pump you up. You do not need to be listening to sad, weak, breakup songs while you are physically trying to be strong.

-Find a work out or diet that works for you. Just because your friend recommends it or does it all the time does not necessarily mean it will work for you. It is your life and requires your trial and error. See what works for you, and when you find something you love, stick with it.

-Going to the gym means nothing if you do not eat right; so eat right! (I know it’s not that simple). Remind yourself how much joining to the gym costs per month, and you will want to go more often to make the money worth it. Also, remind yourself that it look you three hours to burn 800 calories, don’t eat it back in 10 minutes for one cheeseburger.

If you need some help accepting your body, here is my advice:

-Get comfortable with a mirror and the camera. You could be having a day where you look and feel great but the second a “caught off guard” photograph is taken, all insecurities break free. So practice—take selfies on your phone, pose in front of the mirror, and learn your angles! (And you don’t have to tell anyone about it either).


-Wear clothes that you like, not clothes that “everyone else is wearing.” When you see super models in magazines wearing an outfit do not ever expect to look how they look in it—it automatically will make you feel insecure when you try it on for yourself. Instead, go through your closet, try things on, and see what you like to wear and what makes you comfortable. Then, go out and buy more of the silhouette you love in different colors to be more stylish and comfortable at the same time!

-Small changes actually play a part in accepting yourself (I know right, change to accept yourself makes no sense) but hear me out. You can still gain confidence without an entire lifestyle change. Maybe try dying your hair or adding highlights to it. A bolder, but different, look might be just what you need to feel more confident. Or, maybe try to make it a habit to get your nails done every week. I know I always feel more confident with my favorite colors painted onto my fingertips!


I want to point out that I do not think anyone is, or will ever be, 100% in love with their bodies and we all have flaws. That’s right, your fitness motivation and super-model-inspired bodies all have insecurities too. So, don’t for a second ever expect to be perfect or wish to be “just like them.” You can never escape self doubt but, whichever way you please; you have to try to be comfortable with yourself.